Friday, February 03, 2006

Just Horsing Around...

First off I’d like to say that this story was inspired by Sassy’s story. Also, I know this is a long post, I sure hope it’s worth it, if not...too bad

My wife had purchased 2 large stuffed horses for Christmas. Now these critters cost $25 when they were regular price, but my wife NEVER buys anything regular price. She had purchased these on sale for $20 each. Some time later an advertising paper came to us from this store listing the horsies as being on sale for $17.50 each. My wife called the store and said can we get the lower price (return them and re-purchase them). They said that would be okay and just bring in the receipt. The problem is this … I was going that direction one day so I got the task of making the “trade”. There are only so many things that make me shudder with fear, talking to strangers (yes, really), using coupons and having to return something to a store!
I got to do all 3 of these things that day (the coupon story may come later).

There is only one cashier in the store…
I do not see any other employees….
I walk up to the cashier and explain the situation and that my wife had called and was told it was ok. She looks at me like I have just explained to her the physics of nuclear fission.

Cashier: I’m just a cashier, I don’t know how to do returns…
The cashier scampers off to find someone, apparently that does know how to do returns.

She comes back (alone) as apparently the mystery someone has explained to her how to do the return.

She brings up the returns screen on the monitor. She types in the code for the horsie…
In the section marked return price it says $17.50 (go figure since this was the current price of the critter). Then she punches in the code again (for the new purchase price) and guess what it says … of course (cuz you are all smarter than she is) $17.50

She stops…
She stares at the computer … not making a single attempt to hide the confusion brought on by the big ZERO staring at her.
Now I give her this, she was smart enough to know that there should have been SOME value there, she apparently knew it shouldn’t say zero.

Cashier: Hold on…
She scampers off again, I assume to find the mystery tech support being.

She returns with an excited look of revelation and starts over. She puts the codes in again but this time instead of leaving them both (the return and the purchase) the same price she changes one of the prices listed … ah … she feels better as the zero is no longer a zero … she looks at me and says …

Cashier: You owe $15.
Me:um…not hardly!

I looked at her computer screen, where she had left the return price as $17.50 but had marked the new purchase price as the original $25. She argued with me that I certainly did owe her the $15 (of course, because the computer said so) I was about to try to explain that if I were buying it at a lower price how could I possibly owe her anything, when she got exasperated and called the mystery person who immediately came over to show her the error of her ways…all is good…right?

When she hit the “cash me out” button on the computer it popped up the “please ask the customer for his/her phone number screen” I told her what my number was and the computer immediately told her that I didn’t exist in their database. The computer automatically goes to the data entry screen where this wizard gets to put in all my information.

You could tell she was excited, as was I, as was the 4 people STILL standing in line behind me.
(Who I believe, left shortly afterward without making a purchase)

She asked me for my last name, I spelled it out for her.
She asked me for my first name, I spelled it out for her. She ignored it and put in “Bob”. She looks at me and says you’re gonna be “Bob”. Okay?
Well it doesn’t matter she says, I just need to put in something for the computer.
Ok, I’m good with that
Then she asked me for my middle initial. I looked at her and said … make it up … it doesn’t matter anyway you said. Apparently pulling a random letter out of the alphabet was too much for her and she insisted I tell her my middle initial.

Then she asked for the address. Again, I say to her, if it doesn’t matter, MAKE IT UP! To which she replies, well the address DOES matter (IMO: because they can’t send junk mail to a fake address obviously)
Trust me on this one, my address is NOT complicated but it isn’t 2 Elm Street either.
I tell her my house number, which she proceeds to type incorrectly. I had to repeat the number 3 times before she typed it correctly.

Finally we are getting near the end of this ordeal and she starts talking about how tired she’s been because of working 3 straight 8 hour days and going to school at the same time. Trying to be polite and feign interest my second oldest daughter (who was with me this whole time) asks her, “what are you going to school for?”

Cashier: To be a nurse.

I took my $5 and my new receipt and hit the door …
We so wanted to tell her when/if she ever becomes a nurse to notify us where she is working so we NEVER go there! But, we were nicer than that and just laughed the whole way through the parking lot.
Pushed by Pusher Robot at 2:17 PM

See what Blogger gemmak had to say about the experience!
See what Blogger Shover Robot had to say about the experience!
See what Anonymous Karen Rani had to say about the experience!
See what Anonymous Sassy had to say about the experience!
links to this post

4 Terrible Secrets of Space:

Blogger gemmak revealed...

Roflmao...I have to do that transaction day in and day out and rocket science it ain't!

Incidentally, here we take the address in these circumstances for security reasons not to send junk mail....junk mail we do another way!

5:54 PM  
Blogger Shover Robot revealed...

Just shove them down the stairs

10:02 AM  
Anonymous Karen Rani revealed...

That was freaking hilarious - I came from Sassy's blog - she's my very best friend and she told me to come read this - too funny!!!!!!!

*yes, I do what she tells me.

(PR: This comment did not post properly due to some freak of nature, so I re-posted it, therefore the timestamp is NOT correct)

11:49 AM  
Anonymous Sassy revealed...

Good gawd, is she related to Ginny that works at my grocery store? She must be. Has to be. LOL!

(PR: This comment also did not post properly due to some freak of nature, so I re-posted it, therefore the timestamp is also NOT correct)

11:52 AM  

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