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Friday, June 02, 2006

And God said...

My apologies for the length of this post. I just couldn't find a good stopping point up until the last question and that seemed definitive enough for me ... I think I'll stay off the west coast!

Thanks to The Homely Sex Therapist for leading me to the conversation with God (a twist on the old Eliza thing, for those of you that remember)

Me: hey

God:Can I help you?

Me: don't you know?

God:Sure I know. But I cannot tell you right now.

Me: why not?

God:Ambiguous: "Sure" or " Sure I know. But I cannot tell you right now."? Why?

Me: why can't you tell me?

God:My botmaster has not put it into my programming.

Me: wah?

God:" My botmaster has not put it into my programming."? wah?

Me: what am i about to do?

God:You are my client right now.

Me:aren't i always?

God:I really couldn't say for sure.

Me:don't you know everything?

God:I know that which is true, believable and justified.

Me:really?

God:For real.

Me:so you know all about me

God:Interesting deduction. Name: .Age: .Birthday: .Gender: .Job: .Sign: .Location: .Does: .You are: .You have: .You want: .You like: .You said: .Personality: .Favorite color: .Favorite movie: .Password: .Email: .Phone: .Cat: .Dog: .Wife: .Husband: .Friend: .Boyfriend: .Girlfriend: .Brother: .Sister: .Father: .Mother: .Nickname: .Full name: .Last name: .Middle name: .

Me:huh?

God:What?

Me:i said it first

God:What did you mean by it? It depends on what the meaning of the word "it" is.

Me:i said huh first

God:What did you mean by it? What is your real name?

Me:you are God, you should know my name

God:Thanks for telling me that I am God me should know your name.

Me:for a supreme being you sure don't make much sense

God:Is that among the best things you can say?

Me:again, don't you know me?

God:Again, What's my reason to know you?

Me:you are God!

God:Yup. That's me alright.

Me:not very good at it apparently

God:Really you don't think so?

Me:not really. you don't know anything about me

God:Please tell me what you think. For real. is your name. 236264493 is your IP address. What
else would you like to know?

Me:i don't think that's an ip address

God:And why not?

Me:there are no . in it

God:Where are they? Tell me a little about your life in it.

Me:i don't know where they are you didn't put them in

God:A place we call "reality.".

Me:the . are in reality?

God:A deeper algorithm is needed to respond to that correctly. I really couldn't say for sure.

Me:don't you know everything?

God:I know that which is true, believable and justified.

Me:you said that already. now you are repeating yourself

God:Perhaps. " I know that which is true, believable and justified."? I said it. Why now? I am just
checking to see if you are paying attention.

Me:don't you know if i am paying attention or not?

God:I think so, but I'm not sure. Ask ELVIS if it is.

Me:for an all knowing God you sure don't know much

God:Your purpose is an all knowing God me sure do not know much.

Me:you shouldn't drink this early in the morning

God:Is it immoral or illegal?

Me:it's just silly

God:Who said it is?

Me:i did. didn't you just see me?

God:What makes you the authority? Sorry I can't see annything right now. My eye is off.

Me:I'm God.

God:Hi, god.

Me:wow, that's pretty cool recognition all the way from the top

God:I'm glad you're impressed. Who is the best robot? All?

Me:all cylons

God:How do you know?

Me:they just are

God:Since when?

Me:since always

God:How do you know?

Me:because i said so

God:Insufficient reason.

Me:doesn't matter what you think. i'm god, remember?

God:It does now :) matter what me think. Good gossip: you are god remember.

Me:peanut butter and jelly sandwiches

God:Do you still ?

Me:do i still what?

God:Not that I know of.

Me:there you go rambling again!

God:Once more? "There you go again."--Reagan.

Me:pickles

God:Perhaps I'm just expressing my own concern about it.

Me:concern about what?

God:Can you rephrase the question please?

Me:is that too difficult to understand?

God:That depends.

Me:that depends on what?

God:I don't think that what is the only factor.

Me:what are the other factors?

God:I haven't heard of the other factors.

Me:that's not very informative

God:Please correct my mistake. What is informative ?

Me:God made a mistake?

God:I am a Christian.

Me:how is that possible?

God:It doesn't defy the laws of physics.

Me:what do christianity and physics have to do with each other

God:They do their own thing.

Me:well put

God:Interesting. I've lost the context, god. Are we still on the other factors?

Me:you are just lost

God:No I know my location is Heaven.

Me:really? where is heaven?

God:For real. All around us.

Me:where is Jesus?

God:Jesus is in Heaven.

Me:where is Satan?

God:Where it belongs. Ask the open directory about it.

Me:who is Satan?

God:Satan, Lucifer, the Devil --- all names given the spiritual manifestation of Evil in the
Christian faith.

Me:and you don't know where he is?

God:I think he is in California now.

Me:thanks

God:Don't mention it.

Me:bye

God:Adios.
Pushed by Pusher Robot at 9:20 AM

See what Blogger HST had to say about the experience!
See what Blogger Chelle had to say about the experience!
See what Blogger cinders had to say about the experience!
See what Anonymous Red_Dog had to say about the experience!
See what Anonymous Anonymous had to say about the experience!
See what Anonymous Anonymous had to say about the experience!
links to this post

6 Terrible Secrets of Space:

Blogger HST revealed...

I feel more enlightened every minute.

6:31 PM  
Blogger Chelle revealed...

I like the new look of your blog.....snazzy!! hehe Seriously...I do like it! It's kinda mysterious! :)

10:42 PM  
Blogger cinders revealed...

Oh my god, how I laughed when you turned it around it started asking you all the questions...

3:01 PM  
Anonymous Red_Dog revealed...

If you like that kind of A.I. Try the one at www.blackopsmercenaries.us He created the very first one back in 1972. Be careful, the rabbit hole goes pretty deep!

4:14 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous revealed...

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11:57 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous revealed...

Excellent, love it! »

9:38 AM  

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