Oh Really? How Is That Exactly?

As I'm sitting in McDonald's today, eating my lunch alone ... yes i suck, I have no friends... I did the only thing a loner sitting in McDonald's could do, I read the cup. Give me a break, it's new, I had to!

"Doing More By Using Less.
McDonald's is proud to be honored ... blah, blah, blah ... and keeps working to further reduce paper waste, save energy, ... "

Wait, what?

Reducing paper waste? It must be true, it was written right on the side of my paper cup, sitting on the paper liner of the tray, beside my paper Big Mac box and the empty paper fry container and the two (okay I'm also a slob) paper napkins and my paper receipt.

Yup, I'm Lovin' It!

Don't Forget The Important Part ...

My fortune cookie from the other day:

Lucky numbers: 2, 4 ... er ... no not that part. This part ...

You are offered the dream of a lifetime. Say yes!

Let's not forget the implied ending! I'm not sure the wife was thrilled!

Searching ...

Well I was wondering what I was going to post about today. I haven't been around in such a long time. Then I read one of my favorite blogs and well the only thing I could think about was vomiting and kind of put a damper on the whole thought process. Thanks a lot Chickie!!!
So in order to cleanse my brainstem I went to see what things I had missed on Engrish and found this ... how fitting after reading Chickie's blog!

You May Have Underestimated Her

Based on the phone message on our answering machine, the employees (specifically a certain manager) of the previously mentioned Skyline Chili, may have underestimated my wife. Having called the head office of the restaurant to complain about the treatment we had received, my wife ended up with a return call on the answering machine. It was quite long but I'll sum it up for you.

Sorry you had a bad experience. I will be in the area and will have a meeting with the management at that store. We will send you a gift card. If at any time you have any more trouble feel free to call me.

That is basically the summary of the extensive phone message. We did receive a second call from the admin. assistant of the person who called before to make sure we got the message and to verify where to send the gift card to. She was told that we don't really NEED a gift card, that we WILL remain customers but they insisted so we are waiting for that to come in the mail. Why am I telling you all this ... oh yeah ... the person who left the message? Get this ... the VICE-PRESIDENT of the company. Oh yeah, almost forgot .... the phone number she left us to call her at if we ever had trouble again ... the home office number? heck no ... HER CELL PHONE.

I so want to program the vice-presidents cell number in my phone, walk into the restaurant again, and at the sign of any trouble ... "Do I need to get the VP of your company on the phone? She's right here in the speed dial!" I wonder if that would get better service ... er ... maybe just more spit in my food?

Drive-thru customers are more important

Is it just me or has the fact that fast food restaurants put such a heavy weight on the amount of time a car spends in a drive-thru as a metric for determining how good their restaurant is that they've totally neglected the fact that customers inside are exactly that ... customers?!

This has become evident to me on numerous occasions ... but last night was TOTALLY obvious. We were at Skyline Chili and we had a problem. The problem was the heaping pile of fries pictured in the menu vs. the 7 fries that came in a little bowl, for which they expected us to pay $4.19

The request to see the manager was not mean and the waitress explained she would get her. We assumed that "she'll be right over" meant you know ... maybe ... she'll be right over. She never came. As we are getting near the end of our meals and getting ready to go my wife goes over to the manager instead.

It's at this point the manager explained rather rudely that she couldn't come over to see US because she was quite busy working the drive-thru. (There were 4 other employees working in the store and they were NOT busy). Apparently, paying customers eating IN the building don't matter.

Big Mac Attack

Here's the scene. In my hand I hold a coupon. I know, I know, a man with a coupon...already this story doesn't sound plausible. Just for the record the wife and kids were with me too. Wife = coupon book. So, really, I have a coupon. It says FREE Big Mac with the purchase of an Extra Value Meal.

I hand the coupon to the cashier and tell her I'd like a #1 (Big Mac Extra Value Meal).

Cashier (reads the coupon): You have to order an extra value meal.

Me (didn't I just?): Yes, a #1.

Cashier: And you want another Big Mac?

Me (isn't that what the coupon says?): Um, yeah.

Is it just me or does McDonald's need to stop making their coupons so complicated?